It seems inevitable that as we walk the path of becoming more of who we are, we are gonna fuck up along the way.

Sometimes I’m in the middle of making a decision that is a foray into a new way of being or step away from a well worn pattern, and in that place I say to myself:

‘maybe this is a huge mistake, maybe it’s a huge fuck up…

and maybe that’s ok, maybe that’s exactly what I need to experience’ .

It opens up a lot of grace.

And it’s been a season of that for me.

Hyssop is known as the flower of forgiveness, used for purification of holy places, among other things.

Working with this plant and flower essence has shifted my understanding of forgiveness from something heavy that I associate with sin and shame, to a kind of grace around the inevitability of fuck ups.

It’s a leveller – we all mess up. We all do things that impact ourselves and others negatively.

Some spiritual practitioners will carry this plant as part of their essentials. It’s used for purification for people they work with and also for themselves if they’ve done questionable work.

That last part is what most interests me.

It tells us that power carries deep responsibility, that choices have consequences, that alignment is a constant inquiry. That practitioners will have knowledge of many many aspects of reality, not just the shiny ones.

It also suggests this inevitability to me: you will get dirty at some point. On purpose or by mistake or both.

‘I forgive myself and I forgive everyone else’